Wait, the Short Film We're About to Shoot
Translated from Chinese by Claude. Read the original
College life is full of unknowns. From morning to night I’m always busy, yet I couldn’t tell you what I’m busy with. Today I met the female lead of the short film. I’m the male lead, but the female lead… how do I put it, she’s pretty short, and I have no idea how the director picked her. Oh well, I already said yes, so I’ll just grit my teeth and do it. What’s happened lately has made me feel that the only person I can really count on is myself. Everyone else is fake; only I and my family are truly worth trusting, and the ones who let you down the moment it matters are your friends. I thought the short film we’re about to shoot was just a graduation project for an upperclassman a year ahead of me, something shot for fun. Only after I took it on did I find out it’s an entry for a competition. Well, only then did it sink in. But I hadn’t been treating it carelessly before either. I take everything seriously, especially things I’ve promised other people. Lately I’ve liked jotting down sudden flashes of inspiration in my phone’s notes app, and there are two lines I want to keep reminding myself of: Learn to endure loneliness; life calls for keeping a low profile. You can’t borrow money or ask for money your whole life; one day you’ll have to pay it back. That second line makes me sad no matter what. I’ve spent all my living allowance. My parents didn’t give me enough and told me to ask them for more, but I just can’t bring myself to ask. Honestly, I don’t want to spend my family’s money anymore, but I don’t have a job right now, so there’s nothing I can do. One of our teachers once said that even if your family doesn’t give you money, you can still live just fine, because every person, every animal, has the will to survive. You can stay alive; you can find a job and live perfectly well. I want to give it a try. I’ll record every bit of my life here, without leaving anything out. Starting today I’m going to spend a lot more time at the library and let myself soak in the ocean of knowledge. Just wait for it: Wait.